*has a bag of sour gummy worms* hey you want one *you go to grab a blue-red one* *I immediately stop you* no not that one

(via zackisontumblr)

Me listenin to drake: 


My coochie listenin to drake: 



me: im so gay

straight people: stop…..thats a slur… mean that youre so homosexual………….

(via yaesthetic)


@zayn listen no offense but please drag my miserable ass across your lap so i’m resting on your glorious thighs and you can spank the shit out of me until i’m biting down into the fabric of your jeans and my cum is so thick it could actually be used as lubricant for animals giving birth

(via zaynthirsty)


*accidentally purposely turns conversation sexual*

Before jerking off : 

i would literally suck 6 dicks rn

After jerking off : 

men are gross


guys: i know the basics on how to respect women

everyone: okay..

guys: w-wait where are you going aren’t you gunna suck me dry

(via queerburning)

September 15 2014